Ecological Anxiety Syndrome

Updated: Oct 24, 2020


A course of 'Idongivadam'

I am suffering from Ecological Anxiety Syndrome. The symptoms are mixed but are characterised by night-sweats, unexpected bouts of crying over the stumps of what were once trees and an unwholesome desire to grab some people by the shoulders and shake them repeatedly whilst shouting "Can't you see what you're doing!" - until they ask me to stop. I have been to the doctor and he tells me it is just a symptom of my ardent belief that we are killing the planet. He's put me on a course of pills called 'Idongivadam'. Apparently if I take 3 a day with meals I will be over the worst within a few weeks and be able to integrate back into a society whose bodies naturally manufacture this wonder-drug.


Seriously, though, how much do we care about the destruction of our environment? Because every day I read or hear about some new type of poison we have thrown in extravagant quantities into our lochs or see waterfalls of newly-fallen rain washing out of our increasingly bare hillsides or listen to more news about valuable peat being dug up so we can grow a few flowers.

Should we care? After all, our lifespans are finite and in a few decades it won't be our problem any more.


No it won't - it will be our children left holding back the tide. Unfortunately, by then, the tide may just overwhelm them. We have to start doing more than congratulating ourselves on producing electricity by wind power alone. We have to care whether Forestry and Land Scotland wants to actually look after the environment entrusted to them or wants to remove as much tree cover as it can in order to make money. We have to ask if NatureScot should really be the organisation responsible for looking after our wildlife or should instead be rebranded 'WildliferemovalScot'. Because if we don't, the agencies to whom we have given the authority to 'manage' our vanishing planet will likely contribute to killing it.


I have decided not to take the pills after all and just live with the symptoms - after all, I would rather care about the world, and Scotland's future, than do nothing.